chapt 53,

2nd week of sch reopen.
wat have i done? hmmmm...
as usual, din really attend/payingattentionduring lesson well.
haha. its been such busy weeks for me.

first week,
Mon,
din attend monday lesson coz just got back from KL! haha
but i did go sch for frisbee. prepare for club crawl.
Tues,
tues attend afternoon lesson only and went to prepare for club crawl again.
Wed,
prepare again?
thur,
club crawl!
fri,
club crawl!

total numbers of freshies signing up for freezebee = 263!
HEHE!
okay busy week no need to say so much! ( actually is cant remember wat i did)

2nd week,
MON,
can really remember wat i did but remember holding a meeting with my team.
planned program for tues orientation for freshis! haha.

tues,
me alvin aaron and ben join the netballer to play some netball.
whaha i felt i can play better in netball!
quite fun but there's wun be happy ending for everything.
i injured my middle finger and it swelled not very bad.
it's getting better now! hehe.
frisbee:
amazing outcome for the turn up!
although last minute we doesnt have our actual training ground. =(
we got all the tennis court thanx to the coach and netballer and not forgetting...
my lovely teammates! thanx to all of them!

wed,
thou the turnup is not as much as tues,
there's still many freshies!
ben is getting pissed coz he is trying his best to settle them down
and all of us is not helping him. zzz
all of us den start to get serious and help him out.

emotions lead us to hatred and hatred leads us to war.
emotions will really kill us! x_x

actually, wat i felt was..
i want to be in a place where i can do wat i can,
not a place where i can do wat they wan me to do.
i wanna be in a place where i can train wat i'm good at
but not a place where i can train wat they wan me to be good at.
it's like a hamster in his cage.
that wun bring us any further.
to improve, we need more spaces and freedom.
Lemonsick @12:06 AM
chapter 52,

i've drowned my phone. so no pics to update! T_T
let me update some KL trip.
KL trip to me is okay la. did enjoy the trip and bla but not the competition.
somehow, i felt that i really become lousier in frisbee liao.
cant kope with the rest. sian.
feeling kinda very low morale + no confident in myself.
really feel like giving up.
many friends talk to me and gave me supports somemore i'm the captain leh.
how can say give up so easily 1. sigh!

ok, back to KL trip.
the main objective of KL trip is Malaysia Open.
some "big" event for frisbee. some kinda big competition.

$70/person.
more like a fee for me to gain experience or rather a fee to be a cheerleader.
my playtime was very little at KL, mayb due to my experience or standard.
every point i got sub out i will start to ask ard whether i did any mistakes not but wat i heard was, "no, u're doing good." bla bla bla.
but i was somehow "bench" thru out the game. i mean lots of point.
nobody tell me where i went wrong or wat i've done.
i was like a dumbass waiting for my turn to play. dumbass lol.

so after everything, washed up and was abt to go back to our apartment,
someone told me something. he ask me to go over and sit beside him.
"u wanna listen to something? but if u listen already will u du lan(angry)?"
den i told him that, "if i dun listen wun i be more du lan(angry)?"
so he told me la,"actually, every point u played there's a mistake in it(oh my, bullshit. -.-) bla bla bla bla(coz i think i wasnt really listening to him)"
den i cant really remember wat i did, i only remember standing up and walk away from him. y bullshit? bcoz i did ask him during games, have i done any mistakes?

so after we went back to singapore,
i told ben that im really very pissed, sian, pressure and tired.
i have enough of all this shits.
all this lousy throws, low-confident, negative thinkings and etc.
i din performed in any matches, i dun wanna be any burden seriously.
damn fucking low morales and so no motivation at all la.
so fucking depress also la.
but he told me something,
he said that, there will be a fall in every successful path.
"i'm giving u a chance now to overcome all this, i dun wish to see u give up now."
something like that. "everyone have this period, u gotta overcome it now or never."
if i quit now, i'm just running away. i will not learn anything but lose a chance.

there's always up and down. now i'm a captain. my mentality gotta change.
i need to control the team and not control by them.
and at the same time i hope i wun get into trouble. making my teammates angry.
screw up the team etc. i wanna be independent. i dun wanna rely on others.
mayb wat i need now i time. TIME!! time is very important.
really gotta thanx alot of my friends for the morale support!

sian, i think i'm too sway till i'm used to it already.
PSP LOST in action in KL-SG coach. fuck.
now HP spoil. waffak. more to come! GG

no. 27
Lemonsick @1:17 AM
chapter 51,

TML! off to KL!!
actually, there's nothing to post at all.
today i read newspaper, JB - KL bus over turn.
1 dead and 31 injured. omg.
reason: driver falling aslp while smsing. wtf!?
lets start praying for tml and sunday trip. >.<

will update once i'm back! =) hopefully nothing happen to all of us!
watch this magic! amazing! haha.


Lemonsick @1:02 AM